Best 50 alcohol quotes,a collection of famous or funny alcohol quotes

alcohol quotes,a collection of famous or funny alcohol quotes,here you will found best alcohol quotes,sayings,enjoy our best alcohol quotes,alcohol funny quotes,drunk quotes,and food quotes,etc.

alcohol quotes


1.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? –  Steven Wright


2.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.- Anon


3.
A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts. –  Steve Fergosi


4.
A horrid alcoholic explosion scatters all my good intentions like bits of limbs and clothes over the doorsteps and into the saloon bars of the tawdriest pubs.– Dylan Thomas


5.
A man hath no better thing under the sun, than to eat, and to drink, and to be merry. – Bible


6.
A man ought not never to get drunk above the neck.  – Author Unknown


7.
A woman drove me to drink, and I hadn't even the courtesy to thank her. – W.C. Fields


8.
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.– Ambrose Bierce


9.
Ah that’s just drunk talk, sweet beautiful drunk talk. –  The Simpsons


10.
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My achilles heel, if you will. – Homer Simpson


11.
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. – Homer Simpson


12.
Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains. – Mary Pettibone Poole


13.
Alcohol is a misunderstood vitamin.  – P.G. Wodehouse


14.
Alcohol is a very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person would do at eleven in the morning. – George Bernard Shaw


15.
Alcohol is like love. The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you take the girl's clothes off. – Raymond Chandler


16.
Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts. – Finley Peter Dunne


17.
Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life. – George Bernard Shaw


18.
Alcohol kills slowly. Good, I'm in no hurry.   — Coluche.


19.
Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy. – Frank Sinatra


20.
Alcohol removes inhibitions – like that scared little mouse who got drunk and shook his whiskers and shouted: "Now bring on that damn cat!" – Eleanor Early


21.
Alcoholic friends are as easy to make as Sea Monkeys. –  Dry


22.
Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having. – Mitch Hedberg


23.
All is fair in love and beer. –  Kurt Paradis


24.
Alright brain, I don‘t like you and you don‘t like me, so just get me through this exam so I can go back to killing you slowly with beer. -Homer Simpson


25.
Always be drunk … Get drunk militantly. Just get drunk.    — Charles Baudelaire


26.
Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut. – Ernest Hemmingway 


27.
Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. – Winston Churchill


28.
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do. – Dylan Thomas


29.
An oppressive government is more to be feared than a tiger, or a beer. -Confucius


30.
As long as you represent me as praising alcohol I shall not complain.  It is, I believe, the greatest of human inventions, and by far – much greater than Hell, the radio or the bichloride tablet. – H.L. Mencken


31.
Babies are like the smallest, drunkest people you know.    — Nick Swardson.


32.
Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors… and miss.  – Robert Heinlein

 

33.
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.– Anonymous


34.
Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder. –  Anonymous


35.
Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. – Benjamin Franklin


36.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.– Benjamin Franklin


37.
Beer is the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.  – Homer Simpson


38.
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. – Homer Simpson


39.
Being half drunk is just another way of saying ‘your almost there. – Jarrod Conway


40.
Brandy, n. A cordial composed of one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.  – Ambrose Bierce

 

41.
Candy Is dandy, But liquor Is quicker. – Ogden Nash


42.
Champagne is the only wine a woman can drink and still remain beautiful.– Mme. de Pompadour


43.
Champagne, if you are seeking the truth, is better than a lie detector. It encourages a man to be expansive, even reckless, while lie detectors are only a challenge to tell lies successfully.  – Graham Greene


44.
Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic's best friend. – Gerard Way


45.
Don't trust a brilliant idea unless it survives the hangover.  – Jimmy Breslin


46.
Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?– William Shakespeare


47.
Drink the first. Sip the second slowly. Skip the third.  – Knute Rockne


48.
Drink what you want; drink what you’re able. If you are drinking with me, you’ll be under the table. –  Anonymous


49.
Drink, sir, is a great provoker of three things . . . nose-painting, sleep, and urine. Lechery, sir, it provokes, and unprovokes; it provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.  – William Shakespeare

 

50.
Drinking beer doesn’t make you fat; it makes you lean… against bars, tables, chairs, and poles. –  Anonymous

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